buying things for myself, for the 1st time in 2011

Yesterday (sat) was quite tiring, slept 3 hrs after long chat with sis & have to wake up - to show up for work. After work I decided that this day would be an exception, I will buy things for myself, for the 1st time this year.

I realised I never buy things for myself; new clothes come from Birthday gifts (no new clothes during CNY), hypermarket - to pick up groceries & hang thoughts (yeah, like hanging clothes, in a way); my old clothes, as long as they weren't qualified to be floor mat, would be my favourite suit. My room - bro's SPM chair, rusty table from nowhere. My Samsonite work bag, given by ex-company's associate director, not as a gift but leftover. My favourite sling bag's (my only sling bag also) "metal holder" just broke last night too, after about 4-5 yrs use, i think.

Funnily, i'm not thrifty & i'm far from looking for gifts. Just that i don't find it remotely amazing to get many new stuff, or to look good. I just get what I need

, and yesterday i needed an exception.

So I went to Jusco Tebrau, got myself 3 good books and a deco 'flower pail' (for the office desk), and the urge to make an exception stopped.

First book

2nd book

the flower pail..

3rd book..

Hope i smell the roses more..

and that's how it will look if my blog is viewed in "mosaic"

still, not.

the sea is blue, the greens are green. stay still? not, says the world that surrounds. they urge, be fast, be proud and very efficient. for?

looming questions, i find myself asking- or would it be, whither go you?

whether it is.. withering in the wide path or blooming in the narrow streets, if i am lucky to see the difference.

there's no hard & fast I thought so. Slow I am to your response, demand. Understands me not. And left is, mighty arm upholding the withering in the hopeless heights. the, always. can you see, he asks. still, not. i am, am i not, or else. A flower? No, my dear. The flower.

new look for web browser, happy~

A long forgotten Bday wish

That you will always be well. No longer are the breath of a thousand wishes, the quick tear, and the long goodbye.

For the hands of the everlasting are faithful for all of our hearts..

Trust, and lean not on my own understanding.


*And as a sign of this milestone, i'll change this old user pic.. no longer have to hope to run away..



and please do..

Priorities

Lord, help me focus on my weekday priorities...

1. TAWG
2. Family
3. Studies
4. Work
5. Relationships

And fulfill my grandmother's wish someday soon, hopefully before she passes on..



For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light.

~Colossians 1:9-12

失明前我想记得的四十七件事

Tree

But blessed is the one who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.

~ Jer 17:7-8

Ordinary

Everybody doing their part for the world..

It's all about you

Raison d’être..

A different tomorrow

I hope to be different starting tomorrow. Give thanks more, think more about the noble things rather than sulk at the darker side. Remind myself of who He is & what He has promised. Life is too short to cringe my face at the lemons, rather, be making lemonade.

Thou my best thought, by day or by night; waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

失敗者的飛翔

累了.. 1st time work until chest pain..

Juwita

will write soon..


too tired, never mind.. HA

Full throttle study

It's a beautiful purple-ish blue sky as I woke up for a quick jog before work.
Jogging helps me throw my thoughts out better & appreciate what I have more..

It's 7.20am now, better wash up now to leave for work.
ACCA results is out, it appears that I have to retake again & sacrifice more, back to full-throttle study. Thank God more used to work now, can solved issues in shorter time.

Discipline, Victor, discipline. And thanks mom for the honey quaker oat breakfast. I better run now, my parents have already left for work.

4 months is pretty fast

I overheard my bosses discussing about me, "4 months is pretty fast"... Cos i've only joined the company about 4-5 months.

But i don't care if you think i'm pretty brilliant or still lacking in some areas.
I am struggling to find meaning in the things I do.

Responsiblities of a young man

I was talking to my sis about relationships n stuff and she told me to write this blog post cos there will be some younger readers reading abt this, so here it goes..

I remember when I was about 21-ish years old, as older boys we will seriously start thinking about the future. Besides discussing about girls, we will begin saving up for the future. Things my father did which I don't know, I will start learning about it.

CHORES

Things like how to call the mechanic, how to change tyres, do housework, cook, place bank FD, take phone messages.

FINANCES

Going further, insurance planning, savings and maybe some knowledge in investment & others: housing loans, car loans, calculation of paying off study loan, how much it costs to prepare for marriage, how to spend & save adequately. Know what are true assets & liabilities, you'll be surprised.

If very much interested in finance - value investing & property investment. Do you know what is the miracle (or disaster if it's a loan) of compounded interest?

Challenging our views of the world to change from me-centric to also providing for others. How much to save ar, enough to survive on it for minimum 6 months. (let's say you need $1,000/mth, should have at least an untouchable $6,000)

MINISTRY

Ministry-wise, especially for some of my friends, some will begin drifting away, but for those who stayed, they started grooming people, which is such a huge challenge because we have no experience whatsoever. Also learning to see the bigger picture from working together or chatting with adults. learning to serve where you are placed, not because of peer or romantic influence.

FRIENDSHIPS

who are your close circle of friends, they will have a significant influence to your perspective, priorities & responsibilities. do you still maintain friendships with non-christians and bring Christ to them when the opportunity arises; if no opportunity, do you still care for them sincerely. what are your common topics with close friends, do they bring edification to yourself and others.


LADIES

i guess the fundamental issue is that firstly, they are the special species. i need to understand why they deserve to be served first before i serve myself.

secondly, seek to understand them. it's a never-ending journey, period.

thirdly, which most of us neglect, value them. Value their thoughts, value the way they do things, the way they express themselves, their perspective. by then appreciation naturally develops.

examine the way you treat the ladies in your family =P

INTERACTION

After understanding your parent well enough, start understanding other adults around you. Be able to hold meaningful conversations with adults, adults who are in their 30s, 40s, 50-70s, single adults, married adults, married adults with children, retired adults.

Next, children & teenagers. Same as above, be able to bring yourself up/down to their level. The best level for conversation is at the same level, whether in status or physical; if little children are too short, bend slightly or even squat down when you speak to them. If they are bigger children or teenagers, hold them up the respect you would give an adult but interact at their level.

Learn to treat people of different status & races with respect. How do you think of the college's janitor & the Dean shouldn't be too different.


CONTENTMENT

This will affect your lifestyle - know the difference between joy & happiness, and make up your mind which one you want more.


SIGNIFICANCE

it would be good time to find out what contributes substantially to your personal significance & check its value against eternity. Check what are links between your passion, talents & significance. Slowly extend your contribution to add to the significance of others.




bla bla... so if u're around 19-22 yrs old as a young adults, i would encourage you to continue reading the bible, applying its principle, n learn to discern the guidance of the holy spirit.

And on another personal note, do read up Dale Carnegie's "How to win friends & influence people" and start applying its important principles too. It's like a masters degree in people skills.

I'm still learning even as i'm writing these.. Cheerios~ there is hope for the masculine

柴米油鹽醬醋茶

生日快乐，过了。。
风筝累了，隨着夕阳低下了

(if i could write chinese faster, i would write it all in chinese , today the thoughts spelt out in chinese)

who says happiness belong to the deserving, it came by from the people who loved you, who played their music around your grey cloud. sour de, spicy de, did not pass away, they blend the sweet & tea and made me a beautiful tale sung over gu zheng & pipa. Family is xin fu de, ren jian man yi zhe ni de zhu fu, wo man xin gan xie, ni gei de mei yi di 柴米油鹽醬醋茶

Saturday

I think i worked too hard till the point of exhaustion, 'cause i can't function well on last saturday, to attend to church meetings & practices, but after a good night's sleep, some of it went away, along with the slight depression that comes with it. the unexpected lucrative job rewards doesn't help much too, besides the good feeling for a few hours.

I question myself frequently, about meaning of life and definition of living for Christ. I question about relationships, there are so many things I have thought through yet not understand.

Coming week is yet another busy one, i think consideration for staff benefit & actual maintenance of operations may be slightly lacking but I am considering how to start the slow momentum towards a paradigm shift to better holistic growth. big words, small actions - trouble with literature. no, trouble with myself. action, action, motivation & initiation for better control. Start with appreciation & understanding, end with growth? How to push without encouraging staff turnover? I am far from shouldering the heavier responsibility but these have kept me intrigue by human nature and its reaction towards work.

Problem is I think too much and lacked experience to improve this, and i spend too much time FB-ing & watching videos rather than practicing what i really wanted to do - grow. And once again I have to whisk in the strong arm - discipline.

Office risk

There is a certain uneasiness i am all too familiar, it sounded like the first confused moment i had in my baby steps in the taxation fire ladder. so what makes it now in a different environment, had my eyes been like calloused feelings to the surrounding demands, and how had my gentle tone seemed nauseous to your audacious attitude resounding professional pride which should not be the pillar of a sound company, should it be, shoot it please.

The Country (poem)

I wondered about you
when you told me never to leave
a box of wooden, strike-anywhere matches
lying around the house because the mice

might get into them and start a fire.
But your face was absolutely straight
when you twisted the lid down on the round tin
where the matches, you said, are always stowed.

Who could sleep that night?
Who could whisk away the thought
of the one unlikely mouse
padding along a cold water pipe

behind the floral wallpaper
gripping a single wooden match
between the needles of his teeth?
Who could not see him rounding a corner,

the blue tip scratching against a rough-hewn beam,
the sudden flare, and the creature
for one bright, shining moment
suddenly thrust ahead of his time -

now a fire-starter, now a torchbearer
in a forgotten ritual, little brown druid
illuminating some ancient night.
Who could fail to notice,

lit up in the blazing insulation,
the tiny looks of wonderment on the faces of his fellow mice, onetime inhabitants
of what once was your house in the country?

Bday wish.. =P

Beautiful night

It was sunset gleaming with pride before fading off
the monday night pasar malam had its usual homey atmosphere
uncles aunties that sold stuffs since my childhood days were still around
chinese new year is near so there's the festive mood
firecrackers, sky lanterns
mommy holding child & home clothes

and i walked back to the car with packed dinner & hot tao fu fa.
this is JB, this is home

quick one

1. God saved me from another almost-accident, from the anxious traffic law-breaking black BMW.
2. After prayer meeting, parents said i played drums well, long time never hear me play
3. I was the one who is heavily burdened, i didn't work or study during today's public holiday, i didn't go out n play, but i still looked drained n exhausted.

goodnight.

Still..

Still.. there are things so deep a person forgets to forget.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNnYTgpgkQM



I will soon. And I will seriously write poetry again someday.

10 things to note abt career

10. Understand your strengths & weaknesses
9. Build up your tool box
8. Go beyond your comfort zone
7. Be a team player
6. Under promise, over deliver
5. Communicate, communicate
4. Understand simple F/S, good business fundamentals
3. Build trust
2. You own your career
1. Seek God's guidance by His timing.

JJ Heller - What love really means

He cries in the corner where nobody sees
He’s the kid with the story no one would believe
He prays every night, “Dear God won’t you please…
Could you send someone here who will love me?”

Who will love me for me
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me
‘Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means, what love really means

Her office is shrinking a little each day
She’s the woman whose husband has run away
She’ll go to the gym after working today
Maybe if she was thinner then he would’ve stayed
And she says…

Who’ll love me for me?
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me?‘Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means, what love really means

He’s waiting to die as he sits all alone
He’s a man in a cell who regrets what he’s done
He utters a cry from the depths of his soul
“Oh Lord, forgive me, I want to go home”

Then he heard a voice somewhere deep inside
And it said, “I know you’ve murdered
And I know you’ve lied
And I have watched you suffer all of your life
And now that you’ll listen, I’ll tell you that I…”

I will love you for you
Not for what you have done or what you will become
I will love you for you

Made for more..

Don't care about money don't care about fame
Not chasing some great accolade
Oh I want more
I've never been much for flattery
So don't waste that kind of talk on me
Oh I want more

More than this whole world can offer
More than all that time destroys
And all I've wanted here can't satisfy my wanting
'Cause I was made made for more

Well I've climbed as high as status goes
But I've got social vertigo
Oh I want more
Never thought my gifts would seal my worth
I never wanted fans just wanted church
Oh I want more

And after all I wasn't made for here
But I give myself to all you gave

Well I want to see my kids grow old
And always have your hand to hold
Oh I was made made for more
Made for more


Isaiah 58 9:12

Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

“If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
¹⁰ and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.
¹¹ The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.
¹² Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.

I'm very touched by God in this morning's sermon by uncle Chong Hiang and during altar call. The call to live for eternity is once again being reminded.

Character vs Comfort
Give vs Get
Eternity vs Temporary

Have I spent too much time preparing to stay but don't spend time preparing to go?


And was being shown a glimpse of the heart of God during altar call about the cry of the people in need, kept weeping.. funnily somebody (not church staff) that prayed for me thought i was crying cos very hurt n heart-broken made me very confused and laughable after. =P
not blaming that person though, it's only less than a year since the BGR ended and i still lead a simpler lifestyle. what can one say, when i rode the motorbike in the rain to meet my (then) girlfriend's parents for dinner in the first meet, when i was still working 13-15hrs a day.

i spoke to parents about perspective, and they reprimanded me about something very important
which made it clear to me about what God was teaching about these days. Cos i was very concerned about how people perceived me and why did they treat me as somebody i'm not.

"The reason why people's negative words had so much effect on you, is because you are not grounded on the word of God."

"oh...."

Will I look to God, read & learn from His word always?

Quoting the above bible verse, will I do away with ungodliness? Will I do away with finger-pointing n malicious talk, and really, start spending on the hungry & oppressed? How rare are the people I know that are not in need? How blind can my eyes go & mind wander?

Christ's love will compel us to love, and nobody will live for themselves while facing eternity.

I was made for more, more than self-gain, more than wealth & worries. I am made to love you and live your higher calling. This is where it begins - daily.




C.T. Studd, part of 7 cambridge graduates who devote their lives being missionaries.

Only One Life ~ C.T. Studd

Two little lines I heard one day,Traveling along life's busy way;
Bringing conviction to my heart, And from my mind would not depart;
Only one life, 'twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last.

Only one life, yes only one, Soon will its fleeting hours be done;
Then, in 'that day' my Lord to meet, And stand before His Judgement seat;
Only one life,'twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last.

Only one life, the still small voice, Gently pleads for a better choice
Bidding me selfish aims to leave, And to God's holy will to cleave;
Only one life, 'twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last.

Only one life, a few brief years, Each with its burdens, hopes, and fears;
Each with its clays I must fulfill, living for self or in His will;
Only one life, 'twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last.

When this bright world would tempt me sore, When Satan would a victory score;
When self would seek to have its way, Then help me Lord with joy to say;
Only one life, 'twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last.

Give me Father, a purpose deep, In joy or sorrow Thy word to keep;
Faithful and true what e'er the strife, Pleasing Thee in my daily life;
Only one life, 'twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last.

Oh let my love with fervor burn, And from the world now let me turn;
Living for Thee, and Thee alone, Bringing Thee pleasure on Thy throne;
Only one life, "twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last.

Only one life, yes only one, Now let me say,"Thy will be done";
And when at last I'll hear the call, I know I'll say "twas worth it all";
Only one life,'twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last.

reading BIBLE =)

before 1 Jan 2011 passes by too long, it's an excellent opportunity to catch up on following any "finish the bible in 1 year plan" =)

2010 ending, last words.

Many things happened this 2010 yr..

The joy of building up and pain in accepting the break of a new relationship
The months spent thinking about career path & meaning of life and eventually quit the audit job
the crazy job... the crazy, crazy audit job...
The journey thru church doors and Cambodia orphan homes
The new found job without job-searching and worries of west africa & india, the RM500 million acquisition..
Moving back to JB
Juggling of work demands, ministry needs, study requirement and lack of proper social life sometimes
Internal struggles, barely avoiding breaking point and complicated thoughts
The joy of guiding and watching the younger ones grow
learning n guiding senior staff
Stresses in the feeling of incompetence followed by God's deliverance
Procrastination & inhumane perseverance
Tiredness, exhaustion.

Yet God is faithful, and His grace and strength is overwhelming.
What would next year be? What multitude of experiences awaiting? What joy & peace in Christ through all circumstances?

Psalm 139

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

¹ You have searched me, LORD,
and you know me.
² You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
³ You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
⁴ Before a word is on my tongue
you, LORD, know it completely.
⁵ You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
⁶ Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

⁷ Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
⁸ If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
⁹ If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
¹⁰ even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
¹¹ If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
¹² even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

¹³ For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
¹⁷ How precious to me are your thoughts, God!
How vast is the sum of them!
¹⁸ Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.

¹⁹ If only you, God, would slay the wicked!
Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty!
²⁰ They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
²¹ Do I not hate those who hate you, LORD,
and abhor those who are in rebellion against you?
²² I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
²³ Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
²⁴ See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

You are ever faithful.. =)

"With everything that You've started in me, I believe that You will be faithful"

~Lincoln Brewster ("Best Days", 2010)

Till then before the 31 Dec countdown, spend time withdrawing myself to seek the Lord and renew my mind for a fresh start =)

Lincoln Brewster - Best days

awesome christmas-eve movie!!! =D

Merry Christmas

Luke 2

The Birth of Jesus

¹ In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. ² (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) ³ And everyone went to their own town to register.

⁴ So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. ⁵ He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. ⁶ While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, ⁷ and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.

⁸ And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. ⁹ An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. ¹⁰ But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. ¹¹ Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. ¹² This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”

¹³ Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,

¹⁴ “Glory to God in the highest heaven,
and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”

¹⁵ When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”

¹⁶ So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. ¹⁷ When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, ¹⁸ and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. ¹⁹ But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. ²⁰ The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.

²¹ On the eighth day, when it was time to circumcise the child, he was named Jesus, the name the angel had given him before he was conceived.

Jesus Presented in the Temple

²² When the time came for the purification rites required by the Law of Moses, Joseph and Mary took him to Jerusalem to present him to the Lord ²³ (as it is written in the Law of the Lord, “Every firstborn male is to be consecrated to the Lord”), ²⁴ and to offer a sacrifice in keeping with what is said in the Law of the Lord: “a pair of doves or two young pigeons.”

²⁵ Now there was a man in Jerusalem called Simeon, who was righteous and devout. He was waiting for the consolation of Israel, and the Holy Spirit was on him. ²⁶ It had been revealed to him by the Holy Spirit that he would not die before he had seen the Lord’s Messiah. ²⁷ Moved by the Spirit, he went into the temple courts. When the parents brought in the child Jesus to do for him what the custom of the Law required, ²⁸ Simeon took him in his arms and praised God, saying:

²⁹ “Sovereign Lord, as you have promised,
you may now dismiss your servant in peace.
³⁰ For my eyes have seen your salvation,
³¹ which you have prepared in the sight of all nations:
³² a light for revelation to the Gentiles,
and the glory of your people Israel.”

³³ The child’s father and mother marveled at what was said about him. ³⁴ Then Simeon blessed them and said to Mary, his mother: “This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be spoken against, ³⁵ so that the thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your own soul too.”

³⁶ There was also a prophet, Anna, the daughter of Penuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was very old; she had lived with her husband seven years after her marriage, ³⁷ and then was a widow until she was eighty-four. She never left the temple but worshiped night and day, fasting and praying. ³⁸ Coming up to them at that very moment, she gave thanks to God and spoke about the child to all who were looking forward to the redemption of Jerusalem.

³⁹ When Joseph and Mary had done everything required by the Law of the Lord, they returned to Galilee to their own town of Nazareth. ⁴⁰ And the child grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom, and the grace of God was on him.

The Boy Jesus at the Temple

⁴¹ Every year Jesus’ parents went to Jerusalem for the Festival of the Passover. ⁴² When he was twelve years old, they went up to the festival, according to the custom. ⁴³ After the festival was over, while his parents were returning home, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem, but they were unaware of it. ⁴⁴ Thinking he was in their company, they traveled on for a day. Then they began looking for him among their relatives and friends. ⁴⁵ When they did not find him, they went back to Jerusalem to look for him. ⁴⁶ After three days they found him in the temple courts, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. ⁴⁷ Everyone who heard him was amazed at his understanding and his answers. ⁴⁸ When his parents saw him, they were astonished. His mother said to him, “Son, why have you treated us like this? Your father and I have been anxiously searching for you.”

⁴⁹ “Why were you searching for me?” he asked. “Didn’t you know I had to be in my Father’s house?” ⁵⁰ But they did not understand what he was saying to them.

⁵¹ Then he went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them. But his mother treasured all these things in her heart. ⁵² And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man.

Revelation 12

The Woman and the Dragon

¹ A great sign appeared in heaven: a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet and a crown of twelve stars on her head. ² She was pregnant and cried out in pain as she was about to give birth. ³ Then another sign appeared in heaven: an enormous red dragon with seven heads and ten horns and seven crowns on its heads. ⁴ Its tail swept a third of the stars out of the sky and flung them to the earth. The dragon stood in front of the woman who was about to give birth, so that it might devour her child the moment he was born. ⁵ She gave birth to a son, a male child, who “will rule all the nations with an iron scepter.”And her child was snatched up to God and to his throne. ⁶ The woman fled into the wilderness to a place prepared for her by God, where she might be taken care of for 1,260 days.

⁷ Then war broke out in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. ⁸ But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven. ⁹ The great dragon was hurled down—that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the whole world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.

¹⁰ Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say:

“Now have come the salvation and the power
and the kingdom of our God,
and the authority of his Messiah.
For the accuser of our brothers and sisters,
who accuses them before our God day and night,
has been hurled down.
¹¹ They triumphed over him
by the blood of the Lamb
and by the word of their testimony;
they did not love their lives so much
as to shrink from death.
¹² Therefore rejoice, you heavens
and you who dwell in them!
But woe to the earth and the sea,
because the devil has gone down to you!
He is filled with fury,
because he knows that his time is short.”

¹³ When the dragon saw that he had been hurled to the earth, he pursued the woman who had given birth to the male child. ¹⁴ The woman was given the two wings of a great eagle, so that she might fly to the place prepared for her in the wilderness, where she would be taken care of for a time, times and half a time, out of the serpent’s reach. ¹⁵ Then from his mouth the serpent spewed water like a river, to overtake the woman and sweep her away with the torrent. ¹⁶ But the earth helped the woman by opening its mouth and swallowing the river that the dragon had spewed out of his mouth. ¹⁷ Then the dragon was enraged at the woman and went off to wage war against the rest of her offspring—those who keep God’s commands and hold fast their testimony about Jesus.

Joy of serving the next generation

*When too tired, printscreen =P

Your best years are ahead ~~

short & sweet ~





& Simplicity ~

1st day back to office after exam

1st day back to office after exam, and i got called for discussion by the GM, senior accountant & treasury dept even before i find my seat, and later on again called to the GM room for discussion.
and then in 30 mins whisk away for a full day's seminar n discussion on implementation of SAP.

how small & busy i felt but still gotha cope & improve...

"oh the kid's gotha learn a lot"

Who you hang out with

When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus.

~ Acts 4:13

Only memories

As of mid-Dec 2010, all my colleagues in the same audit team in my previous firm has resigned & left. What's left are only memories of the crazy hours, extreme stresses, wide exposure and fun we had while coping with them.

All went back to their respective countries, indonesia, australia, china, me malaysia, another further to UK. All have gotten stronger & wiser...

sigh.. memories..

Holocaust to Lincoln

A few years back when I had a few weeks of holiday from college, I did a brief research on the Holocaust and it changed my perspective in life.

And if I am granted holiday again someday, next will be on the life of Abraham Lincoln.

I want to know how he journeyed from a child till his death - the miles walked just to borrow books, the person who only had less than 2 years of formal education, the many hours spent reading the bible and copying parts to memorise it, his work as a farm labourer, rail worker, military captain, grocery store owner, postmaster, land surveyor, lawyer, political figure & US president.

The numerous, numerous setbacks - Family lost land title, death of mother at 9 yrs old, considered to be lazy by family & neighbours, 1st fiance died before marriage, 2nd relationship failed, 3rd one split as marriage day approaching. Business failed, business partner died, bankruptcy & spent 17 yrs repaying debt. 2nd son died at 3 yrs old, 3rd son died at 11 yrs old, 4th son died at 18 yrs old. Had nervous breakdown, suffered from clinical depression.

Politically: Defeated for state legislature, defeated for speaker, defeated for nomination for Congress, lost renomination, defeated for US senate, defeated for nomination for vice president, elected President.

Consistently rated as one of 3 greatest presidents of US. Went through the civil war, preserved the union, ended slavery.

Die when I may, I want it said by those who knew me best that I always plucked a thistle and planted a flower where I thought a flower would grow.

~Abraham Lincoln

Shy's impression

Like My Status & I will tell you ---

1) How we met
2) My first impression of you
3) What I like about you
...4) Favorite memory with you
5) A song that reminds me of you
6) Dare you to put this on your status

Victor
1. Teenz? You're priscilla's elder brother and alan raved about your drumming skill haha.
2. You looked dai dai and sleepy but turned out to be crazy both in humour and behind the drums.
3. You think deeply about the things that are hap...pening and makes me feel less crazy.
4. Hanging out after teenz going for supper, but rivaling badminton sessions =)
5. I Am Nothing - Ginny Owens

Everything that occurs..

Everything that occurs teaches and prepares you for the next stage of life.
Nothing is lost.

~Zig Ziglar

Nothing is lost, comforts the old melancholy in fading youthfulness. Forgotten feelings are only feelings. Today, He made all things new.

You will surely find at the journey’s end,
Whatever the world may afford,
That things fade away, and success is seen
In the life that has served the Lord.

Both Sides Now

Bows and flows of angel hair and ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons everywhere, i've looked at cloud that way.
But now they only block the sun, they rain and snow on everyone.
So many things i would have done but clouds got in my way.

I've looked at clouds from both sides now,
From up and down, and still somehow
It's cloud illusions i recall.
I really don't know clouds at all.

Moons and junes and ferris wheels, the dizzy dancing way you feel
As every fairy tale comes real; i've looked at love that way.
But now it's just another show. you leave 'em laughing when you go
And if you care, don't let them know, don't give yourself away.

I've looked at love from both sides now,
From give and take, and still somehow
It's love's illusions i recall.
I really don't know love at all.

Tears and fears and feeling proud to say "i love you" right out loud,
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds, i've looked at life that way.
But now old friends are acting strange, they shake their heads, they say
I've changed.
Something's lost but something's gained in living every day.

I've looked at life from both sides now,
From win and lose, and still somehow
It's life's illusions i recall.
I really don't know life at all.

~Joni Mitchell

Sonnet XVII

when too stressed, read poetry.. Pablo Neruda.

I don't love you as if you were the salt-rose, topaz
or arrow of carnations that propagate fire:
I love you as certain dark things are loved,
secretly, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that doesn't bloom and carries
hidden within itself the light of those flowers,
and thanks to your love, darkly in my body
lives the dense fragrance that rises from the earth.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where,
I love you simply, without problems or pride:
I love you in this way because I don't know any other way of loving

but this, in which there is no I or you,
so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand,
so intimate that when I fall asleep it is your eyes that close.

is it..

to most i am this, to a handful i am that, to some, maybe; to the few, silently.

Purpose

"God’s purpose is not to perfect me to make me a trophy in His showcase; He is getting me to the place where He can use me. Let Him do what He wants.."
~Oswald Chambers (My utmost for His highest devotional)

Stress management

Learning to handle a "small" manufacturing company. To them it's small, to me & my inexperience, it's overwhelming at times.

Coping with a work that I heard usually need months of training first. How long am I working here, slightly over 2 months, do I look like a kiddo with too heavy responsibilities. Learning.. learning.. to be dependable, to hold up with colleagues and a support group of staff older than me.. To be able to hold a good level of understanding and give sound advice when they come to me.. and to cope well in my personal capacity. Not a manager but due to being somewhat in the lower middle of the corporate ladder, have to serve the supporting staff members. First time doing so, previously in SG only an assistant. Many things to learn & teach & guide, many more hours to put in, much more leadership qualities & problem-solving skills expected.

And where is God, have my whirlwinds spin Him off the centre of my life? I came to church so exhausted i think i yawned a dozen times during prayer, there are many things done and not done; there are things that I have done well and things I used to hold on to tightly but now have neglected. Eh... I have changed.

Faith is not a crutch. Faith may be a strength unknown of human ability & a vision with a purpose. And I know Your joy is exceeding and never fades. You never change, Your love is always the same. So here I am, to abide & follow You, everywhere from the drum stool to the executive chair, and to the hopeful unknown region in future.

Found in You

There are many things that could warm a heart; by having a fulfilling career, great family, lovely partner, beautiful children, close friendships. A home, a house, a fun car, all-round growing ministry.

But above these desires, I am found in You. I am found in You. And I'll live the life You want me to.

Our main business

‎"Our main business is not to see what lies dimly at a distance, but to do what lies clearly at hand."

~Thomas Carlyle

Father Samaan and Garbage City

This is a short documentary on Father Samaan and "Garbage City" where the Zabaleen of Egypt live. It is about the miraculous transformation of the people through Christ and the building of the Church in the Mokattam Mountain.

1st episode - done!

Today marks the end of 1st episode of this career in JB. Merging, assist to manage & now relocating back to main office for a combined accounting staff of 30+.

Had the best chicken rice in PG @ LAN coffee cafe..

Next, SAP & new consolidation pack. Waiting & hoping to be posted soon.

This is the video that will make me work harder, much harder

Joy

The joy of the Lord is my strength.

Falling apart

There is a very fragile thin line holding everything outside the family. I am a bad juggler in rubber balls like ministry, work & studies. Say work, well I have been sick 3 times already and once waking up at 4am to do work but to find myself falling back to sleep again every hour until 7am and later show up in office tired. Bad stress management. Ministry - I have not been follow through "-ing" completely. Bad ministry partner. Studies - who knows what can this guy come up with - been so smart to study at McD from 7-8.30am before a 10-12hrs work day, eventually burning himself up to fall sick and look sickly tired at work. Bad time management.

If not for the grace of God, the guy sitting a few feet away from you is quietly falling apart. What I am, the things He has made beautiful in my life, in His time, it's all Him. No me.

Going to sleep, too much in mind. Got a feeling, something's gonna burn up soon.

窗外瞭望

窗外瞭望

晨雾茫茫
缓缓升起太阳
匆匆一天开场
有人已经在忙，有人才刚起床
后脚还在梦乡，前脚踩进天光
当我将双眼闭上
一条泪河
窜流中央...

Names

There are a handful of names going thru my head soon, names unheard of in CBC, probably seen before in person but not knowing them. This thing leads from handling the band, no choice. On a separate matter, I am happy to safely say my music collection is now complete.

As for the singers for the band, think Glee. Probably.

Ps 39

“Show me, LORD, my life’s end
and the number of my days;
let me know how fleeting my life is.
You have made my days a mere handbreadth;
the span of my years is as nothing before you.
Everyone is but a breath,
even those who seem secure."

“Surely everyone goes around like a mere phantom;
in vain they rush about, heaping up wealth
without knowing whose it will finally be."

the beautiful weekend

sister came back.

went for a malay wedding luncheon with dad n sis, thereafter visited the monash medical campus in the hospital, admire the colonial architecture. drove around old town area, admiring beautiful houses and had great time with dad.

Ming Soon came by our house for a while, he shared his joy of praying to God and getting his desires, got an A for UPSR malay and gotten entry to English College - meaning don't have to leave home to the vocational school for handicapped in KL.

heard from sis about his mom's testimony, a powerful word from God in the book of John about the story of the blind man, being born blind not because of the parent's sins but for the glory of God. She cried n cried after reading this..

celebrated sis' n dad's birthday.
attended company's annual dinner.

still had outstanding office work though. massive stress after being informed after sat night.

missed wmm committee meeting, missed church's vision casting meeting, missed david n nec's farewell party. missed sun service's sermon. missed socializing with friends. settled part of christmas prac, still settling christmas' youth band arrangement - more than i expected, hope will be great for the kids.

watched online new life church sermon. Learned about the greatest desire of God, expounded from Genesis, Ezekiel and Isaiah. cried.

cell group was great too.

find myself kept listening to this song.. find lots of comfort in tiredness..

Rubber-band life

Another long day at work, near those make-it-or-break-it days..

Life feels like a big big rubber-band, it never stops stretching.

Got a feeling that it's the start of the next great 10-year cycle. Tough but unexpectedly fulfilling, again the road less travelled?

The Here and Now and Not Yet

What prosperity gospel gets right, what suffering theology gets wrong, how both miss the point.. reading..

http://glennpackiam.typepad.com/my_weblog/2010/11/the-here-and-now-and-not-yet.html

Loved

opps, falling sick again.. too much too much....



"I like not only to be loved, but also to be told that I am loved. I am not sure that you are of the same kind. But the realm of silence is large enough beyond the grave. This is the world of literature and speech and I shall take leave to tell you that you are very dear."
-G.Eliot


I thank God that during this Sunday's worship, out of the many things He could have said, He reassured that I am loved.

And the 2nd best thing that happened is that my best friend asked "how are you?". It has been a long while, I can't remember when's the last that somebody asked how am I as the start and content of a whole conversation.


Glee

Dreams

I guess the ownership and clarity of dreams would move me forward.

Sesame Street - drums

Kermit interviews Animal, discussing his influences and his love of drums. When animal mentions that he likes to eat his drums, Kermit says, “How ‘cymballic’,” prompting Animal to yell, “Bad pun! Bad pun!” Kermit decides not to replace Animal with a new drummer, Tony Checkers, after Animal beats Kermit senseless.

• During the first drum solo on this compilation, Animal plays so fast that his drums go up in flames.
• The second drum duet is a classic drum-off between the great Buddy Rich and Animal. Buddy Rich’s talents cause Animal’s jaw to drop open, before he throws a drum at Buddy’s head in a fit of rage. This is one of the best Sesame Street sketches of all-time, AND it displays examples of rudimental techniques combined with great showmanship.
• Animal shows how overplaying can annoy the other musicians in the band (and the audience). The singer Rita Moreno, is not impressed with Animal’s hilariously out-of-control playing during the song, “Fever.” When an aggravated Rita tells Animal to chill, he decides to play in an even louder and out of control manner.

Campus dreams

If I were to take my course on a full-time basis rather than online, this would be the place I frequent for lectures. Goodbye, campus dreams. Hereon to the professional working world..

great movie for deepavali =)

sofa chair room

i could use a comfy sofa-chair & calming lights in the room..

romanticize, london skies

Heartbreak truth

You are not your own

"...The first thing God does is get us grounded on strong reality and truth. He does this until our cares for ourselves individually have been brought into submission to His way for the purpose of His redemption. Why shouldn’t we experience heartbreak? Through those doorways God is opening up ways of fellowship with His Son. Most of us collapse at the first grip of pain. We sit down at the door of God’s purpose and enter a slow death through self-pity. And all the so-called Christian sympathy of others helps us to our deathbed. But God will not. He comes with the grip of the pierced hand of His Son, as if to say, “Enter into fellowship with Me; arise and shine.” If God can accomplish His purposes in this world through a broken heart, then why not thank Him for breaking yours?"

~Oswald Chambers

The Switch

every once in a while in all randomness, something unexpected happens and it pushes us all forward; and the truth is, when i'm starting to think, when i'm starting to feel, is that maybe the human race isn't a race at all.

If i were to be a singer, i'll be..

Khalil Fong.

方大同

when u can't get enough of the same song

The 6 greetings

1) Oh my goodness it's so hard to find young musicians that are willing to practice, i don't even require much talent, none are willing to prac, very few find passion in the joy of music-making or worship. goodness will the next musical generation cease to survive..

2) yay, the holding company launches its first sustainability report today! In accordance with the Global Initiative Report, finally the world's leading edible oil manufacturer has put environmental and social responsibility on paper to satisfy the larger stakeholders.. hope that tomorrow won't be too tiring.. big report to prepare with my inexperienced mind.. goodness i still have to prepare for the coming exam too and prevent myself from falling sick again..

3) it just started raining now at 10.30pm, the rain falls down, breaking the tangled rambutan leaves to the ground, or the rusty zink covering outside my room, produces an incomprehensible serenity to be enjoyed lying on the bed with utter silence. Not one word to be spoken after breathing in the wet, fresh whisk of sky, breathing out sheer delight.

4) i find stewardship management to be fairly effective in corporate leadership and also in ministry. Not that it is a great method, but a great lifestyle.


5) oh my goodness look at that little kid, can she get any cuter than this?

6) how are you? =)

There are only very few close friends who can understand that these 6 things can come out from the same person at the same time if he chooses to... maybe it's preferable that i stay single for now, lol.