15Malaysia

15Malaysia is a short film project. It consists of 15 short films made by 15 Malaysian filmmakers. These films not only deal with socio-political issues in Malaysia, they also feature some of the best-known faces in the country, including actors, musicians and top political leaders. You may think of them as funky little films made by 15 Malaysian voices for the people of Malaysia.....


Slovak Sling

to be

pondered over my life and see what do i really want to do..

observed the attitudes and life of others, christians, managers, financial controllers, company directors, managing directors, other account execs, auditors, corp secretarial staff, admin staffs, TnT ppl, pastoral staff, cell group leaders, housemates, friends, teenz ppl, australian dudes, indonesians, myanmar n china nationals..

ups and downs, perks and what-nots..

i think now i have a slightly better understanding on what to do n what to avoid in life, but it's still mainly about doing the very things God has put in your hands and doing his will. the world has a very subtle way of persuading your mindset. there's only 1 life to live, only 1.. not to waste but give it for eternity.

some of the best movie soundtracks.. =)

Pomplamoose music

some non-mainstreams.



remake of single ladies

wedding bliss

went to my primary sch classmate's wedding today. she's the only "outside my church" friend who is a christian. attended her wedding ceremony n luncheon held at danga bay. many pastors n friends joined n the ceremony is great. i really can see the difference between someone who receives Christ n loves him. the blessings n God's guidance is so vastly different from my other non-christian pri sch mates. she's married to a young specialist doctor n will move to melbourne soon. from her gratitude speeches, can really see how God bring different ppl into her life to guide her n made her into the person she is today.

wow.. being in love with God n walking in his path makes ALL the difference in the world. it's not all about the blessings, it's the difference in character - being refined to be pure gold.

i'm so tired after the luncheon, going back to SG again n despite the Hari Raya holidays, got classes during public holiday but i'm thankful to God for his providence n guidance daily.

hopefully there'll be no more weddings to attend next month.

Principles to live by

Compiling a list as a reminder to myself..


1. Be rich towards God, don't only store up treasures for myself (Luke 12:13-21)

"Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions"

2. Hold your tongue, watch your words. (Proverbs)

Let it commend knowledge, bring healing, avoid sin, bring forth wisdom, speak truth.

touching auditions

life's ok, work's ok, studies' ok...
bits of here and there, nothing much to say..
been watching quite a bit of youtube lately, here's 2 touching auditions :)

beautiful sunset

Timbre & Joel

Went to Timbre @ the arthouse with my roomies. He said there's great music and I should go at least once for exposure. It's quite nice, beside the river at raffles. The ambience is great. Had a glass of Chardonnay. I think the group's best rendition is Taylor Swift's teardrops on my guitar.

very nice la, everything, but just felt very sien. still preferred music@church.


Last week we met up with Joel @ New york new york, City Hall. He's flying back soon, gonna study masters @ Stamford. Great time catching up.

ok, gotha go work.

Are u singing? :)

I don't know what the future holds, but i'm singing :)

Satu Suara (happy national day :)

workbook

just bought the most expensive workbook of my life, the advanced taxation workbook cost me S$65, about RM150 i think, for the beautiful cover and 1.5 inch stack of binded paper.. well, gotha study anyway, after vomiting some blood, ha.

i found myself loss for words sometimes, which might be good, less talk more action.

The original Umbrella song

eh, not Rihanna

touching wedding proposal

longing for fresh water

been tired for a very long time, i longed for rest, for a long sleep, time out, vacation, for the moment in worship service where this flood of freshness will wash over me.

then i thought i can do this right now, after bathing, to come before him with fullness of my heart, acknowledging my need and addressing his love n power, express my gratefulness and bring forth my petition, recall his promises, rest my unfruitful thoughts, rest in Him. so let's do this.

India Arie - Heart of the Matter & Umbrella

sky

it's time to rest, to push, to soar; tip toe dancing on the blue line, whistle a yellow tune, watch birds fly. i like the mornings, i love the setting. we walk across the streets till the orange sun comes up, see the grey shadows form and disappear into the side tight houses. it's bright, it's windy, chilly. My tie's a flying. no school. let's get something to eat. what's your favourite, what's mine. buns. Don't rush, sooth it like time and its heat will run. enjoy the slow brown gravy. enjoy the company. enjoy the enjoy. we thought of sitting on the purple bench, we thought of dreaming. we sit on the green grass contemplating the blue. we become bun eaters, become cool. we become pilots, doctors. we design, teach, guide. we become rich. we remain white simple. our little hearts turn giant. giant in vision, giant in love. giant in patience. giant in life. giant. big ones. chubby. little did our eyes squint enough to let the sun reflect some. shiny when look from the sidelines.

it's time. oh my silver coin. it flipped out and rolled into the drain. we discuss. we decide. i thought i would leave it. i went in. pick up. wipe a wipe. good to use. yeah. good to use. for another bun, another day for the same. move and sky. always. move and sky.

Fearless

http://vimeo.com/5429687

http://www.maxlucado.com/fearless/


and Perseids today. gonna watch one someday.

Butterfly fly away

SG national's day over. Starting work again soon tomorrow, result's gonna be out soon, in a week. nice song below, reminds me of the Beatles. warm fuzzy feelings before i sleep. can't believe i said that, ha.


You tucked me in, turned out the light
Kept me safe and sound at night
Little girls depend on things like that

Brushed my teeth and combed my hair
Had to drive me everywhere
You were always there when I looked back

You had to do it all alone
Make a living, make a home
Must have been as hard as it could be

And when I couldn't sleep at night
Scared things wouldn't turn out right
You would hold my hand and sing to me

Caterpillar in the tree
How you wonder who you'll be
Can't go far but you can always dream

Wish you may and wish you might
Don't you worry, hold on tight
I promise you there will come a day
Butterfly fly away

Butterfly fly away, butterfly fly away
Flap your wings now you can't stay
Take those dreams and make them all come true

Butterfly fly away, butterfly fly away
We've been waiting for this day
All along and knowing just what to do
Butterfly, butterfly, butterfly, butterfly fly away

Butterfly fly away
Butterfly fly away

Love story & Viva la Vida

Watch this in HD, it's beautiful =)

just now watched a movie trailer abt a realist who fell in love with a poet, and the words he spoke in some of the occasions were astounding. Things like when someone else confronted him, he pushed the person angrily and said "there's a holiness to the heart's affection that you know nothing about".

woah, haha, nice! how i miss poetry. music like this, some poetry, a McD choc milkshake and a bible under esplanade during sunset would make a perfect evening =)

"A thing of beauty is a joy forever, its loveliness increases, it will never pass into nothingness."

Ultravision

I can't believe I forgot to attend Dawn's wedding practice. So coming sat gotha be there early to go through the songs and enjoy the ceremony & luncheon thereafter.

Thank God i'm much better, don't wanna fall sick again for this month. this morning my colleague happen to hop into the bus at the same time and began telling me about this perpetual tiredness she felt since starting work. Looks like i'm not the only one, cheers mate. and then in the office, read "our daily bread" and it teaches abt giving thanks in every circumstances. I like the way the heart feels when it starts giving thanks for teeny tiny bacon bits and also the major blessings for today. Ok, after postponing for more than 2 weeks, reminder to buy a good empty book to keep a journal with God.

Thank God for coming long weekend because monday's a public holiday due to SG's national day, and it also marks my 1 year anniversary in the workforce! I can't believe I survived and broke through! =)

Made a 3-seconds evaluation and I know i'm stronger, wiser, have more capacity in handling colleagues, managers & directors, work and I recognise the widened room for growth. The next half year will be even more crazy but I want to make it worthwhile. I'm also glad that after taking a break from TEENz, i have time to spend with my outside friends, talk crap, encourage them and hopefully lead them come to Christ one day.

ok, tired, sleep.



just browsed through photos of my bro visiting my uncle & aunt in Perth, nice place.. This is my uncle's website, recommended for those who love arts, esp photography. It's been many yrs since I visit him & my aunt, maybe will do so if going there again.

www.ultravision.com.au

fell sick again

..

Homecoming

http://www.rbc.org/devotionals/our-daily-bread/2009/07/29/devotion.aspx

=)

red veins

i looked myself in the mirror and gosh, i have many red veins on my watery eye balls..ha... time to sleep.

OT or no OT, faced the same perpetual tiredness daily, dunno what's wrong with me lately. But the amazing thing is if I spend time alone with God, then the tiredness will fade away.

went eating and walking with Joel just now at esplanade area, nice to meet him since he moved to london 6-7 yrs ago. Realised that no matter where someone can be, we all still are human and have our own tough road to journey on.

So, gonna sleep...

You are for me (by Kari Jobe)

My sis introduced me to this beautiful song =)



So faithful, so constant and so true
So powerful in all You do
You fill me, You see me
You know my every move
You love for me to sing to You

So patient, so gracious, so merciful and true
So wonderful in all You do
You fill me, You see me
You know my every move
You love for me to sing to You

Lord, I know that You are for me, I now that You are for me
I know that You will never forsake me in my weakness
And I know that You have come now even if to write upon my heart
To remind me who You are
To remind me



and an extra: My beloved.



You're My Beloved
You're My Bride
To sing over you is My delight
Come away with Me My love

You're Beautiful to Me
So beautiful to Me

Under My mercy
Come and wait
Till we are standing face to face
I see no stain on you
My child

You're Beautiful to Me
So Beautiful to Me

I sing over you My song of peace
Cast all your care down at My feet
Come and find your rest in Me

I'll breathe My life inside of you
I'll bear you up on eagle's wings
And hide you in the shadow of My strength
I'll take you to My quiet waters
I'll restore your soul
Come rest in Me and be made whole

You're My beloved
You're My Bride
To sing over you is my delight
Come away with me my love

fell sick again

sian, didn't rest enough, fell sick again. Well, at least can have a day off resting at home
=) =)

yay!

wanted to post some photos of Ion Orchard, but dunno why it won't load into blogspot. never mind.

Perfection takes time

Saw this at somerset construction area, it's a caterpillar with wings.. :)

(Ephesians 4:17-24)

So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.

You, however, did not come to know Christ that way. Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

purple flowers on esplanade bridge

it's the blooming season at esplanade's bridge. too bad i didn't take any photos. Maybe will try to take one tomorrow on the way to office.

green plants but the purple flowers are so abundant you only see purple everywhere, it is beautiful =)


oh ya, Orchard Ion is opening soon.

A new chapter of my life has begun =)

Almighty God, the great I am
Immovable rock, omnipotent, powerful, awesome Lord
Victorious warrior, commanding King of Kings
Mighty conqueror, and the only time
the only time I ever saw Him run

CHORUS:
Was when He ran to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again”
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice He said,
“Son do you know I still love you?”
He caught me by surprise when God ran

The day I left home I knew I’d broken His heart
And I wondered then if things could ever be the same
Then one night I remembered His love for me
And down that dusty road ahead I could see
It was the only time – it was the only time I ever saw Him run

And then He ran to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again”
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice He said,
“Son do you know I still love you?”
He caught me by surprise as He brought me to my knees
When God ran – I saw Him run to me

BRIDGE:
I was so ashamed, all alone and so far away
But now I know He’s been waiting for this day

I saw Him run to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again”
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice I felt His love for me again

He ran to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again”
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice He said, “Son”, He called me Son
He said, “Son do you know I still love you?”
He ran to me and then I ran to Him
When God ran

Endurance

Colossians 1:10-12

And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light.

Was spending some time pouring my heart out to God, all my fears of today and tomorrow. Sometimes will be overwhelmed by responsibilities and concerns of others and self, tiredness, and not being able to see or hope for the light at the end of the tunnel.

Then i was comforted by the above passage, to be strengthen by His power to have great endurance. And i looked back at the past 12-months, re-counting the times God has provided endurance in work, studies, relationships. Times when God is faithful, and being reminded that it is at all times.

If i'm like a wet clay spinning 'round to be molded. I think it's painful to feel & see the best part of your clay being chipped off while you're caught up in this crazy whirlwind. But the molder is always above the whirlwind, he sees the masterpiece in you, and he is full of love and in control.

So i will embrace the purpose, learn to abide and be in peace.

Bless the broken road

So early back home in orchard today, saw my room lit by the setting sun brings a special relief to my soul, i can't remember the last time seeing natural light shining through the window.

one word - nice! =)

last weekend accompanied my mom to attend someone's wedding dinner, talked to a friend abt movies, work, life. realised that despite my perspective on work life, actually i'm considered very blessed to be staying at where i am, receiving the salary that i have, and the long hours and tedious work is actually not too bad. will learn to count my many blessings that follow through daily without noticing.

so fu yao asked me abt this wedding gig, another good friend asked me abt her bday bash band, a few more couples asked me to play the drums at their wedding, and my best friend asked me to be the driver instead, lol.

the most delighting gigs to play drums for, besides CBC / worship sessions, would be weddings. feels good to have all these coming around now and then.

felt tired but so relaxed now, can't blog more though i wanted to, need to do some things before i sleep. Seriously, now would be a good time if i am:

1) bathed
2) sitting sweetly by the river at esplanade beside someone special
3) having a McD choco milkshake at hand
4) listening to the below.

ok, there goes the wishful thinking. signing off..


Bless the broken road

digging thru travelling journal

I dug up my wrinkling travel journal that I wrote when i went to melbourne early this year, just gonna write some excerpts of it before i sleep. so many events and beautiful scenery that i gave up writing it all while day 3 in melbourne, ha. I miss melbourne with my bro, and wmm retreat. =P

-------

I got off at Perth, hot, Malaysian "desertly" whether, Perth.

The quarantine check took so long that I fear I might miss my transit flight. Thank God I was very much on time, a very helpful Australian man guided me to the Qantas counter to exchange for a bus ticket voucher (woth A$8) and took a bus ride to the domestic flight terminal.

Perth felt homely, with not many people. Simple but modern facilities (very unlike Changi), and in the bus with the caucasians, i really felt like a foreigner. Asked a lady about the time, tweak my watch;s time abt an hour later, and enjoy the desertly scenes passing by, on route to the domestic terminal.

In this 2nd flight, I am the only (if not more than 2) chinese person in plane. This time i get the window seat with nobody sitting beside me, ha! =P

I was so tired (due to last night's 4+ sleep and the travelling) but i try to keep myself awake in order not to miss meal time. I tell you, meal was great. (pic). haha, yeah. it is heineken, and i had fish with lemongrass sauce (looks like kind of a special curry), grain-filled loaf of bread with butter and cheddar bread, and ended with beer. I am not really fond of beer, just that it keeps me warm in flight.

while doing all that, i look out and saw the most beautiful rainbow of my life =)

-----

The low-quality picture wouldn't justify what i have seen with my own eyes - a horizontal rainbow across, endlessly, a border between mushrooming marshmallows clouds and blue nothings above. The plane flies on, and it keeps coming. This endless rainbow, look long enough, the mushrooms emerge, multiply, in different shades, various patterns..

When i thought it can't be any more beautiful, then comes sunset.

Heads of mushrooms, like roasted by fire, turns red, highlighting its uniqueness amongst the all-blue in white clouds. And the rainbow slowly translates time by bringing its green lower merging its orange red higher before it hits back to sea blue, and all starts to fade, leaving the tail wings of the plane shining like a star in darkness.

(sips beer)

8pm sunset.

How does drinking Evian make u feel?

wmm retreat

wmm retreat was surprisingly great! so much fun and mental relaxation though didn't sleep much on sunday night, tok tok tok. it's been such a long time since i had a real rest, tanjong puteri is still a great place for a very short retreat. the various fun games, standing on the back of wayne's car and enjoying the wind n view of golf resort, the resort's big space and cold air-con, the glorious food. nice.. =)

uncle Albert's sharing abt worship being the Harp and Bowl ministry sounds chim but it's not difficult to understand.

..fun la, the retreat.. =)

ok, gotha catch some sleep and wake up early to do some own work before working tomorrow. don't wanna spend more than ten mins blogging. paid some bills just now thru e-banking, tomorrow gotha go pay the rest, woah, money - hard come easy go.

How are mornings beautiful

How are mornings beautiful? When you wake up early due to the sound of falling rambutans, open your groggy eyes and stumble out to the garden to see dozens of morning flowers blooming yellow against the rising sun.

How are mornings beautiful? When you felt the cold dew kissing your feet and dad's there plucking the fruits. When beds of vegetables and young shoots waking up to your footsteps, and the bird-chirping silence danced alive.

How are mornings beautiful? When you look back and mom's packing the fruits, she prepares breakfast thereafter and had a sip of coffee. And you switch off the fan, knock the door to wake up your sis. she walks around in blurriness and brushes her teeth.

How are mornings beautiful? When the immense gratitude to God rises up from your heart that you're truly blessed to be born into this family.


...

=)

ok, gotha pack for wmm retreat, fetch new friend and go to church.

Talk and talk

It's nice to be back to TEENz twice after exam is over. Though July is coming too soon and I might have to stay longer in Singapore to study and have more rest after weekday's strenuous work which I am yet to get in full terms with. Arg, I really need to depend on daily grace to get through this dynamic routine again. mold mold mold...

So.. attended TEENz. Was unusual at first, cos so long never come, but became real nice, see all the young ones in TEENz, talked to old friends till very late, catch up after the months gone. Talked to teens, drummers, coordinator... blah blah.. talk and talk.. sit and talk, stand talk, phone talk. see my sis lead worship, listened to her give testimony. "hao4 lian4" to my ex-cell member that she's my sister. ha. Talked abt Transformers 2 with him while listening to testimonies. bad .. bad... he haven't watch the movie yet he knows all the fight scenes, amazing.

Received sms & calls from old primary & secondary school friends.. Surprisingly received one from Taiwan. Encouraged him to attend church in Taiwan, he said got approached by them b4 but said he likes to depend on himself, wah, sian. unusual, like suddenly there's a small group of non-christian friends to listen to their problems.

then there's this long conversation with a missionary a few days ago, got me all excited about short-term trips and I've planned. So already submitted this plan to God and see how will it be materialised ba.

tomorrow is sunday service and gonna fetch another new friend. Hope that FGC is a good place for him. Wow i'm so hoping that wmm retreat is relaxing n great fun, wah haven't pack yet, guess i will pack tomorrow b4 going church.

i'm tired now but feels like there's a million thoughts swimming in my head.

I will Love - Hillsong

Soon (Hillsong United)

Soon and very soon
My King is coming
Robed in righteousness
And crowned with love
When I see Him, I shall be made like Him
Soon and very soon

Soon and very soon
I'll be going to the place He has prepared for me
Then my sin erased, my shameful garden
Soon and very soon

I will be with the One I love
With unveiled face I'll see Him
There my soul with be satisfied
Soon and very soon

Soon and very soon
See the procession
The angels and the elders round the throne
At His feet I lay
My grant, my wishing
Soon and very soon

I will be with the One I love
With unveiled face I'll see Him
There my soul with be satisfied
Soon and very soon

Though I have not seen Him
My heart knows Him well
Jesus Christ the Lamb, the Lord of heaven

I will be with the One I love
With unveiled face I'll see Him
There my soul with be satisfied
Soon and very soon
Soon and very soon
Soon and very soon
(Chorus and ending)

God is Cheering for You

this really encouraged me.. =)

yay, after a 12-hr work day, finally, going back to JB... =) =)

God is Cheering for You
by Max Lucado

If your God is Mighty enough to ignite the sun, could it be that He is mighty enough to light your path?

God is for you. Not "may be," not "has been," not "was," not "would be," but "God is!" He is for you. Today. At this hour. At this minute. As you read this sentence. No need to wait in line or come back tomorrow. He is with you. He could not be closer than he is at this second. His loyalty won't increase if you are better nor lessen if you are worse. He is for you.

God is for you. Turn to the sidelines; that's God cheering your run. Look past the finish line; that's God applauding your steps. Listen for him in the bleachers, shouting your name. Too tired to continue? He'll carry you. Too discouraged to fight? He's picking you up. God is for you.

God is for you. Had he a calendar, your birthday would be circled. If he drove a car, your name would be on his bumper. If there's a tree in heaven, he's carved your name in the bark. We know he has a tattoo, and we know what it says. "I have written your name on my hand," he declares (Isa. 49:16).

Emo is the new cool.

Emo is the way of life, the new cool. Because emo is who you really are. because you experience life in a more realistic, artistic, emotional level. normal people won't understand. life sucks, it's quite unfair, you never get what u need and want. and sometimes people hurts. It is quite impossible to move on, but someone sees, someone out there will one day see you as you are, just hang on. tomorrow will be better. he/she will come back soon. Emo is real, nobody feels joy in whole, happiness is fleeting and shallow. So brace yourself..

..

what a load of crap! =P

Somebody else came to give you life, and life abundantly. So don't live the lie so comfortably. If not you will reach beyond 17 or 21 very soon and wonder why you've wasted your high school life chasing after the wind. Wind is things you will regret. God is not wind.

---------------------

ok, now i have it out of my system. life after exam is good, weekend, i went to my sec sch friend's home for wii with the gigantic tv n home theatre, then buffet steamboat. Life as a working young adult does have its perks. though my friend still don't want to come to church at the end of the day, but it's nice fun n we had many meaningful conversations.

work life came crashing back in again but it's enjoyable. k la, gotha go read some great books, do some OT, swim and sleep.

Unashamed - Starfield

Unashamed - Starfield

I have not much
To offer You
Not near what You deserve
But still I come
Because Your cross
Has placed in me my worth

Oh, Christ my King
Of sympathy
Whose wounds secure my peace
Your grace extends
To call me friend
Your mercy sets me free

And I know I'm weak
I know I'm unworthy
To call upon Your name
But because of grace
Because of Your mercy
I stand here unashamed

I can't explain
This kind of love
I'm humbled and amazed
That You'd come down
From heavens heights
And greet me face to face


*Updating my new phone's software thru internet, google the phone's market price and had a shock, it's about the same price as my old phone! times have changed.
It's a W980.

hope in despair

thks, God. progressed really well, i'm almost ready for exam. Stepping into the critical two weeks, and I can be home back to JB & happy. =)

let's hope discipline will be at its peak, if not then forced to be friends with exp subway/starbucks.. =(

oh ya, just got a new phone to replace my 5-6 yr old phone, my friend helped me subscribe to a new Singtel plan, phone's free. Now it's lying in my JB home, i haven't even seen it yet. not bad la, from the brochure, it's double-screened, 3.2MP camera, 8GB space for mp3 and best of all is it can FM transmit (the only reason why i choose tis phone), hehe (can go around intercepting other ppl's radio), tech-wise, way beyond my old phone. but u can bet i will under-utilise the phone features. hopefully will get used to the shake-shake skip song feature and see whether the auto detech song mood really works accurately.

I think i just got a mp3 player that happens to be a phone & camera.

typed "hope", found some photos that impressed my heart. :) till then, be focused.

bobby lee is indeed the scientist

sometimes i do..

exam so soon, missed JB.

Arizona University - Obama speech

Downloaded & watched the whole 30mins speech from iTunes, i'm inspired, yeh, next step on.

..

urgh. just a couple days more, push thru, push thru.

Invisible drum kit

Actually, since 10 yrs ago, I already have my very own invisible drum kit, and i have 2 sets, one is in front of me, another is in my head, it follows me everywhere =P

Mother's day with grandma

I had a great day of rest at grandma's in Kluang on Saturday. =)
That's the Mother's day cake.

Watched good tv channel together, reading her old books, a nice australian pictorial cook book, help pulling tapioca out from the ground.

Home is sweetest

"Most of all the other beautiful things in life come by twos and threes by dozens and hundreds. Plenty of roses, stars, sunsets, rainbows, brothers, and sisters, aunts and cousins, but only one mother in the whole world."

- Kate Douglas Wiggin

Brace yourself like a man

http://www.newlifechurch.org/podcast.jsp --> TheMill podcast --> CO-ED --> Co-ED - Brace yourself like a man - Aaron Stern

(when download sermon title might be "brace yourself like a woman", ha)


A very, very important sermon by Aaron Stern that changed my concept of manhood and challenged me to rise up to be a man.

I recommend you to listen to this if u're a guy =)

[Caution: not for the faint-hearted]


Job 38:3
Brace yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me.

1 Kings 2:2
"I am about to go the way of all the earth," he said. "So be strong, show yourself a man.

1 Cor 16:13 (NASB)
Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.

1 Cor 13:11
When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.

When I survey / pages

I think I am one with my office chair. Ok, i'll stop the loathing.

Alan wrote a really beautiful email about our cell group today, it really warms my heart to see that, hey, there's actually this wonderful side in each of us. I think that email is classic, and Alan downplays himself when he is writing about himself, ha.

(my TnT cell group is awesome, if you're interested, ask Titus)

And solely for my own super-duper feel-good's sake, this is how he described me:

Always the bearer of very funny cold jokes as well as a very visual communicator with God. Victor has a very unique gift that is expressing himself in art forms. His two strongest anointing are music and poetry. God gives him something, he processes it, and shares it with the rest of us from the stage and from his blog. To us, Victor is a very special person in our eyes because he has such a character that is so likeable, so clever, yet so modest. We have a lot to learn from him. :) Currently, he's a busy dude working 42 hours a day so he has to skip CG sometimes, but we always welcome him with open arm. Pray that his workload will lessen as well.

haha. "yeah, woo hoo! but am i really that good? how weird it is to be seen as too artistic and seemed not normal", I heard myself.

Well, if it's true, I wish I could express myself better in person and in conversations, and wished I were really that clever. hehe.

Partly felt a little glad to be working, made me more practical, sensible and less cloudy. Loved the way you aged nearer to a level when love is spending time with others, patience, and seeing beauty in brutal reality and sincere weakness. Of course I am not there yet, let the first step urge the second ba.

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Pages
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Have you ever heard of the story of the legend of....? Where the common folk turns hero, maybe by dire circumstances, through the lost of something really important, or by hard work or chance. The story of a lifetime, the classic romance, the pauper turned prince, duckling to swan, darkness to sunrise, nerd to super-cool, insignificance to greatness, deepest impossible hurt/emptiness to healing and soaring.

Probably today there's nothing, but what if we are a character in a story, and the pages kept flipping. Given a chance, hold His pen, what would we choose to write or draw in the next page. Or if you are as speechless as I am when holding the heavy little pen, at least, what would we name the title of the next chapter, which page would we put a bookmark on, which page would we tear off/treasure. Which way would you look at, will you flip back, read the current page or flip forward first? Which page excites you most? The colorful ones, the empty ones, the torn ones, messy-writing ones, or neatly written and perfumed one?

What makes a great book? Of course a great cover would be the best, everybody sees the cover first. I guess. Oh ya, and then the contents, everything in the story went well, some cute little hiccups, but everything went really, really well. hmm.. What would the ending be? The friend who stayed loyal till the end when the world crash & burn? The square-peg and round-hole strangers who ended up in the greatest love story & marriage? Modern-day Robinson Crusoe? The dysfunctional family that changed the society for good? The predictable normal guy/girl who lived and wonders? The fearless and wild that ended up broke/rich with little tingles of uncommon sense and meaning?
What would u prefer? Fiction, non-fiction, children, self-help, religious, jokes, fantasy, instructional?

hmm..

If the character dies in the end, if even mid-way, will you read it? Will you skip the scary parts of the chapter? Will you first read the part where the character gets married to whom or stays single forever, what choices of further study is given and taken away, when will children be given, great chances being spotted and taken, any preventive steps to take note of, anything to prepare for?

Oh, I remembered. If we write our pages wrongly, we can always send it to our neighbour for review. Remember your neighbour? He is nice, but some people find him quirky, nosey. Some don't see him before therefore think there's no such guy in our neighbourhood. Some of my friends ignore him cos he's not really the type they hang out with.

As for my perfect little house, a little messy (actually a lot and some things falling apart) but perfect, he always come knocking on my door looking for a nice chat with fantastic fresh smelling cookies to offer. No strings attached.

After a while, guess what, i got to know that he is a New York bestseller author! What priviledge and chance to have him look through my self-written pages. He helps change the lines, adds vivid colour and dynamics to the storyline, but before this, he guides me on the technique and concepts of writing. I didn't know there is so much thought and effort needed in even writing a sentence, in plotting a good twist, to engage the senses and capture my heart and readers.

Now my book is better, in a way. At first I thought it won't be my book anymore due to the numerous amendments, but as I look through again from the first pages, seems like it brings out the best in me, of course it has the unmistakeable signatures of my neighbour, but strangely it is something I can call my own.

The book is currently going into the 3rd chapter, and it's already about 2-inches thick. Continue writing anyway, love it to bits. Lately he said that he's going away for a while, a conference somewhere, and asked that I give him the book a while and watch what surprising things he is able to write. He promised to keep in touch. Well, I am still not sure until now, in fact, it is my book right. Dunno la, I think i'll hold it for another day to decide.


--end, i think--

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I created a new survey at the right upper column, fill in ba. =) And i would love to hear comments if the above short passage makes u think.

i hate working for more than 13 hrs,

but there's peace in my heart, and something that tells me it's gonna be okay. Labour day's coming soon, and i'm gonna be so free to study, hehe.

I think I have already lost the artistic side of me, when all do is writing poetry, browsing art paintings, finding a good deviantart pix, visit nature, listening to music, play slow jazz and crazy rock on the drums, in a studio by the beach.

That phase is over, now i enjoy a call to my sis or close friends, mom's cooking, being with my family, waiting for bro to come home, listen to instrumental music/sermons, and lying on the bed talking to God till i fall asleep.

What's up with me.

So, do, la, fa, mi, do, re..

Sound of music in Belgium train station, fwded by Jeff. below, the prayer. Something nice to look n listen to after 1 illness & 1 passing away..

The Prayer - Josh Groban

I still could remember vividly what are the last few sentences she told me, a few weeks ago. She was actually scheduled to be the WL for coming Sunday's service upstairs, songs already selected by her. So, the songs will remain, will be led by yoyo.

"We ask that life be kind
And watch us from above
We hope each soul will find
Another soul to love

Let this be our prayer
Just like every child

Needs to find a place,
Guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
E la fede che
Hai acceso in noi
Sento che ci salver."

Martha

Putting down some excerpts & editions about the Martha/Mary thing.

Perhaps you have felt the same way. You've known the Lord your whole life, and yet you haven't found the peace and fulfillment you've always longed for. So you've stepped up the pace, hoping that in offering more service, somehow you will merit more love and respect. You volunteer for everything: you sing in the choir, you teach Sunday school, you took care of a group of teenagers, you visit the nursing home weekly. And yet you find yourself staring into the night and wondering if this is all there is.

Or perhaps you've withdrawn from service. You've gone the route I've described above and, frankly, you've had it. You've stopped volunteering, stopped saying yes. No one calls anymore. No one asks anymore. You're out of the loop and glad for it. And yet the peace and quiet holds no peace and quiet. The stillness hasn't led to the closer walk with God you've hoped for, just a sense of resentment. Your heart feels leaden and cold. You go to church; you go through the motions of worship, then leave and go home the same. And at night, sometimes you wonder, "What is the good news? Can someone tell me? I can't remember."

Or maybe you are somewhere caught or inter-woven in between. You've been here and done that, but there is this shadow of a dream, or a state of life and mind that feels like it is almost within your grasp but never attainable. You see somebody going to someone else, something got tied or messed up, somewhere you should be.

"What is the good news? Can someone tell me? I can't remember."

The good news is woven through the New Testament in a grace-filled strand that shine especially bright in the Gospel stories of Mary and Martha. The message is this: Salvation isn't about what I do; it's about what Jesus did.

The Cross did more than pay for my sins; it set me free from the bondage of the "shoulds" and "if onlys" and "what might have beens." And Jesus' words to Martha are the words he wants to speak to your heart and mine: "You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed."

The "one thing" is not found in doing more.

It's found by sitting at his feet.

Catch that: Mary sat at his feet. She didn't move a muscle. She listened. She didn't come up with clever responses or a doctrinal thesis. Her gift was availability. (In the end, I believe that was Martha's gift as well.)

The only requirement for a deeper friendship with God is showing up with a heart open and ready to receive. Jesus said: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls". (Matt 11:28-29)

Jesus invites us to come and rest, to spend time with him in this incredible Living Room Intimacy. Intimacy that allows us to hear our Father's voice and discern our Father's will. Intimacy that so fills us with his love and his nature that it spills out to our dry, thirsty world in Kitchen Service.

In the Living Room. That's where it all begins. Down at his feet.

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Warning signs of a Martha overload. Five unrealistic expectations that can contribute to servant burnout, can you see yourself in the following false beliefs?

1. There should not be any limits to what I can do.

2. I have the capacity to help everyone.

3. I am the only person available to help.

4. I must never make a mistake.

5. I have the ability to change another person.

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Five strategies for fighting discouragement:

1. Allow for rest stops (naps, sleep a little earlier)

2. Get a new point of view (take a few steps back and ask God to help you see his perspective in your situation)

3. Have patience (easy to get discouraged when things don't go as planned. But if you've committed your concerns to the Lord, you can be sure he is at work, even when you don't see his hand) Rom 8:28

4. Mingle. (discouragement feeds off isolation, get out of your house, visit some friends. It's amazing how good ol' fellowship can lift our spirits & chase away the blues.)

5. Set the timer. (ok, so things aren't so good, I've found it helpful to set the oven timer and allow ten mins for a good cry. But when the buzzer sounds, I blow my nose, wipe my eyes, and surrender my situation to the Lord so I can move on)

and this video for all my friends who 'love' miley, haha. cut the cheesy moves, it's a good song really.

matter of perspective

So the journey continues. There's always the need to study a little bit more each day. And after visiting Mount E a few times, Orchard Road feels different now.

Once used to be the most happening place, and then became a place I travel by everyday, noticing the daily construction progress of Ion Orchard & Orchard Central. And eventually became nothingness but a facade. And now became just like any place but i prefer JB home.

They say cancer could change a person, didn't know it could change the people around them too.

On a separate matter, went to friend's mom dept in the same hospital, watch a very little infant sleeping in a special containment unit, with a tube stuck near his nose. So little, so fragile. You could almost hold his torso in your palm. yet still living and breathing, what a wonder to me.

I saw another covered containment, empty, i remember my parents told me how i had difficulty breathing when i was an infant, almost died sometimes.. wow, God, you have seen me before i was born, right till now, till my future, all my steps are ordained by you. When I see the little infant lying there, I get a glimpse of how much you love me.

Now i'm big and strong. erm, not that big and not that strong. normal la, ha.

Wish I could be a better person sometimes. But thank God for who I am, with peace.

Today is the day. =)

joy =)

when we cry

I sort of started to see things differently lately after what happened to my big sis. At first life seems to lose its meaning, and then it takes on a whole new meaning. Used to worry abt work, studies, ministry.. Now i've been thinking about life as a whole, as a morning fog, as a gift & abandonment unto God in every area of enjoyment, mundanity and struggles.

I remember the morning when I cried in pre-service, and how God's comfort comes like a friend. Ever prayed and felt God coming so real to u that ur heart will undeniably know he is right beside you? ... real comfort can come from His presence, His word, His promises.

There's this hope and strength that can drive you on, and it goes beyond human limitations. By this one God who exists, whom we can't see but believe in. He loves us. He knows us by name. We are His image and His likeness is shown in us.

And so this fire fuels the fierce, unrelenting passion in loving people and living life without regrets.

..

close friend had cancer..

..

less is more, more is more. ha

gonna move my PC to sis' place in Dover tomorrow night. so i will be using PC much less for the rest of the year, maybe.

i'll miss a lot of things.. but it's ok anyway. just blabber my heart out to God.

I wonder if one day God appears in my dream and take me for a ride in heaven, show me my room (hope that its awesome). and the food there..

or we can just sit on the edge of a cliff overlooking the beautiful sunset sinking into the sea down its endless skies, and talk forever while munching on some good stuffs like japanese octopus balls with choco and sushi handrolls, or american fat sandwich with bubble tea.

or going to a theme park together . screaming and laughing out loud while going through the thrills and scary darkness in the tunnel, coming out frightened but went in again anyway.

or we can go watch a good, long, sappy romantic comedy movie together, wearing real thick and warm while the aircon is so cold but not having the urge to go to the toilet. oh ya, not forgeting the hot melting caramel popcorns, nachos with dip and icy coke.

or we can watch a dvd at home in the living room in winter, beside the fireplace with mashmellows and some good books lying around with a large muffy carpet lying underneath.

ir we can simply soar into the sky, over the leaning tower, 12 apostles, my house, everybody else's houses (ha), chase dogs, pick apples from the tallest tree, fooling around a giraffe's head, scare passerbys (haha). eventually sitting on someone's roof, watching stars flicker and fly. and drift off into another dream.

or we can form a band, he plays the bass or guitar or a whole symphony, while i play the drums, the awesome coolest drums. In an open hall full of people, or none. he will have his limelight, i will try to have mine. we crash and be crazy, throw off our instruments, jump into a pool nearby and
dive into another world of fishes and corals.

or we can just play computer games.

ha. "what la"

God..
there's something about you that is so much, so much more which i don't know about.

Let my dreams run real wild with you. Let my thoughts run with you, let my heart be set on you.

randomness

went home as usual today, bypass orchard road, a car stopped by the red traffic light. A posh, big, 4WD. The lady inside looks familiar. I was standing right beside the car.

oh, it's Fann Wong.

gf

lately some people are sort of asking me or hinting me that it's time to find someone.
my best friend's getting married very soon anyway, in less than a year's time.

people who read this might want to comment something, so, let the comments come ba..

just wanna declare aloud that if u see me with girls/ladies, most likely they are my big sisters. it's nice sometimes cos i don't have a biological big sis and my big super bro is not around. my close friends gave me a lot of wise advice, genuine concern and superb reading materials. but of course my parents & own little sis are still the best. so i'm a lucky guy, ha.

anyway, tired.. want to sleep..

thank you God for today, for teaching me how to live in peace..

good friday's coming soon, yay, public holiday.

nite.

my heart & eyes r a little heavier today, but my God abounds in strength and grace.

Jesmond is leaving next week

This guy ar, last min wan wor. Coming weekend is his last weekend in church liao, then he'll be studying in KL - civil engineering. Same college as his brother.

Today after work suddenly one sms -

"hey bro, juz wanna inform u tat i'll b going off next week 2 kl to further my studies.... gOnna miss u a lot man :-) "


what the!!??!

Whack him when u see him yar! =P


Time flies, i have known him for years... since form 1, i think. There's something about him, quiet faithfulness in serving, something rare among the youth nowadays. I have seen how his drum skills improve, strong groove.

wow, now he's going. so fast. he used to run, but now i believe he will soar from here onwards.
He will start to lead, like how he used to gun in the above picture, ha, joking.

He will lead one day. =)

4 gifts

Lord I pray, grant me these 4 precious gifts, whether by hardship or brokenness, that I may move on this year and be light for you.

Wisdom, diligence, perseverence and gumption.

Victoria Ho

Left office at 5.45pm today, wonderful isn't it =P (for myself only, i guess)
It felt like I had a day off, I can let my hair down for once. It felt like something sprung into life.
Took the initiative to help pass a letter to KPMG, and KPMG closes at 6pm, so there goes, hehe.

Went for a walk thru the places, the nasi lemak stall, christian book shop, browsing thru books, and then my favourite trail, the long walk from raffles place, thru the bridge, asian civiliation museum, the park, and to esplanade's top, library... It seems so different now.

Sat at the stairs at the edge of the stage extended down to the river, watch the unseen sunset's light reflecting against the millions of waves, the towers changing colours. Thinking of everything, and then thinking of nothing.

Suddenly the esplanade staff stuff me a brochure. Then came 7.30pm, the sound started. It's ladies night, a lone woman sat alone on the stage with a guitar and she sings. Late twenties or early thirties, Victoria Ho sings. People gathered around. With a voice similar to Corrinne May's, she sings Michael Buble's "Home".

And then i went home.

Daddy.. daddy.... bloood..

and its not funny.

The oval office

President John F. Kennedy claps as his four-year-old daughter Caroline and son John F. Kennedy Jr. dance in the Oval Office of the White House in October 1962.

I heard about this picture from a New Life Church sermon. What happened in October 1962? JFK informed the world that the Soviet Union was building secret missile bases in Cuba, a mere 90 miles off the shores of Florida. Discussions and serious stuffs..

The oval office, the office of ultimate power, decisions made that can change the world. Top leaders have to make special appointments to meet in the office, commoners find it a lifetime experience to step into the office. The history, the moments. The legend.

and see the two little children dancing away while the most influential & powerful man in the world is clapping away.. =)

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I wonder.. God of creation, the ruler & owner of the heavens & earth. Even when the nations are all before Him, they are nothing compared to Him, regarded as worthless & less than nothing to Him (Isa 40:17). God who structures every multiplication of amoebas and the formation of proteins & DNAs, forms billions of human features uniquely and names every planet & stars that are formed by the millions everyday. Architect of the rise & fall of civilization, directs every artistic vision and philosophic wisdom.

Yet He chose us.

"Come dance in my oval office", you might hear Him say from a distance. Enter my joy, my holy of holies.

Flawed and ignorant as I am, yet it's like instinct. As He claps, you know it is the rhythm, more than building taller sand castles, sweets and lollies, chasing after pretty butterflies, dreaming for the next big thing.

.. =)

I know my father. Run to Him.